As many of you know, as one intrigued by all things hospitality, food and culture related, I had been working some extra hours in a new local authentic Nigerian restaurant. I took on this gig because I wanted to study exactly what modern, NY-style African hospitality is. Would anything change drastically from what I learned at home? As a Nigerian-American born, raised and residing in Brooklyn, NY I wasn’t quite sure that the dining culture I knew of was relevant enough to provide great service at this institution that prides itself on being “authentic”. So I decided to do a little reflecting and comparisons.
Here’s what I do remember of my childhood dining:
1) Our typical traditional meal was pounded yam and soup (mostly ogbono w/ okra and egusi).
2) We always ate together. Rarely did my parents eat alone. The more the merrier. My Mom and Dad ate from the same plate. Sometimes it was my whole family eating from one plate. They would always ask us to wash our hands and join them at the table. Us, meaning my sister and I, who were both born in America. My brother, who was born in Nigeria, ironically didn’t take a liking to traditional Nigerian food!
3) Hands are the best utensils! Pounded yam or any fufu (pounded starch with the consistency of a really dense mashed potato) were eaten with the hands. You break of a small peice of fufu with your fingertips. Use your fingertips to form a ball (about the size of a small gumball) and dip it in the soup using your fingers to scoop up some sauce. To me pounded yam is the African cousin to Italian gnocchi!
4) Before eating always serve your parents (especially Dad, major respect necessary as patriarch of the family) a bowl of warm water to wash hands and a beverage to drink. And by noooo means serve it with your left hand. Please. You will get an earful about disrespect.
5) When handing parents (especially Dad for same reason as above) a beverage and/or bowl of water to wash hands, tell them “Thank you”. Yes, you read that right. When giving something to your parents, don’t wait for them to thank you. You say “Thank you” to them to which they respond, “Thank God”. If they make the mistake of thanking you by no means respond “You’re welcome” which would then remind them you shouldn’t be thanked or be accepting the thanks as your own in the first place. This exchange was also done before the meal after a blessing is said. The children must make thier rounds around the table saying “Thank You” to all the elders (including older siblings) around before eating. As the youngest in the family I was always annoyed by this tradition!! Especially when I was hungry! lol
6) When eating with my parents, it was a sign of affection for them to pick out an appetizing morsel of meat from the soup bowl and offer it to the children. Usually they would do this with the stockfish, which I’m assuming its because its the most…I’m not sure actually…precious?? lol Stockfish is a peice of dried fish that is rehydrated to make stews or soups but still maintain a chewy texture and a unique flavor.
Hmm, that’s about all I can remember for now. But of all the “complexities” of traditional African dining, one thing remains prevalent: Eating time is family time, its a time to commune, to express love and to bring cultural traditions to the American table.
Now, as an adult, I watch my 3 year old nephew, Zephaniah, sit down on his grandparents table during Sunday dinner, eating from a platter of egusi soup and pounded yam with Grandpa and Grandma looking and watching lovingly and happily. Thrilled and at awe that even their grandson, despite having never been to his homeland of Nigeria, can taste the intensity of Nigerian food that is missing from say “mac n cheese”. Grandma makes little pounded yam balls for him. He take a ball, dips it in the flavorful egusi sauce, and puts the delightful morsel in his mouth…he hardly skips a beat, except perhaps to share one of his dazzling smiles to show his approval of Grandma’s execution of his favorite meal! Makes my heart swoon.
This led me to the conclusion that African food, made with love, is the original, feel good ”comfort food” and according to the smile on my nephew’s face, that has never changed!
No comments:
Post a Comment